I recently heard about a conversation about a family who likes to whatch the show "Survivor" together. The mother of this family told another person about how they explain the gay contestants on the show to their kids. I was dumbfounded and anstonished at the explanation. The parents would tell their kids the two men on the show were brothers who really loved each other. I understand they are trying to protect their children's innocence and probably circumvent having a conversation about a topic they are not comfortable with themselves. Just for those reading this post, it is not about homosexuality, but here is a my quick view on the subject. Homosexuality is wrong in God's eyes. This doesn't mean I hate gay people. I love them and have several gay friends, but if God calls it a sin, then it is. Moving along to my main point, we lie to our kids and feel it is okay if we feel we are protecting them. We don't want to hurt their feelings, lose their trust, or like in the example I gave, we don't want to have to explain other people's sin. Lying is so destructive, God made it one of his commandments. He loves us and knows how destructive lying can be to us. He told us not to, to protect us.
Exodus 6:16 “You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor." Simply put, Don't lie! Being a parent to three boys, the ten commandments are taught and explained a lot in my house. It has been the topic of dinner time discussion many times, either in part or as a whole. This past Christmas made me realize how we lie to our kids and the frequency at which we do it. It was alarming. I had probably lied to my 3 year old at least 8 times about Santa Claus. I'm all for the magic of Christmas and Santa Claus, but inadvertently we lie about Santa being real to our kids. Yes, this goes for the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy. Eight times I lied to protect a fictional characters falsehood. It seems silly doesn't it? Yet, we lie to our kids. When a child learns the truth about Santa Claus they feel hurt and they lose a bit of trust from us. When we cover up someone's sin, it is lieing. Like the story above, our kids lose trust in us and we make them feel like we are not being open to them about sin. Sin is shameful and yes it is hard and sometimes very awkward to explain, but covering it up with another sin only makes the situation worse. When the time comes to explain a sin to your kids, be truthful. You don't have to explain it in detail, but do it in love and compassion for the child and the sinner.
Explaining sin to a child in love and compassion takes a deep breathe and patience. For instance, the child sees someone stealing something. The first thing you want to do is tell them why stealing is bad. Maybe ask the question "Would you want someone to steal from you?" Tell them what God says about stealing and that it breaks one of his commandments. If we tell our kids, the person stole whatever it was that they stole for some "good reason", we lie to our kids. The story of Robin Hood comes to mind. I know the moral of the story is so kind to help those in need and who are being oppressed, but it is still stealing. One sin does not okay another sin to reconciliate the first one. All in all, I believe as parents and with some of us leaders to our kids we need to realize, change, repent, and reconcile the damage we have done so far.
No comments:
Post a Comment